Conversation with the 2015 Muse

2015: The long-awaited return of the Muse

By Darlene Cah

Me:
Oh, it’s you. I almost didn’t recognize you.

Muse:
Don’t be snarky. I have other writer clients, you know, and I’ve nudged you a few times this year, and what did you do? Blew me off.

Me:
It was 3:34 in the morning! I was trying to sleep.

Muse:
That was once. What about the others? The deadlines, working late, walking the dog, and the HGTV binge-watch? Facebook! How many times do you have to watch that cat video? You could be writing!

Me:
Okay! Okay! So I procrastinate!

Muse:
Ha! That would imply you, actually, get to the writing, eventually!

Me:
Now, who’s snarky? Didn’t I get that one story, “My Fat Husband,” published? I plugged at that thing for years.

Muse:
Didn’t I nag you to send it out one more time?

Me:
I wasn’t giving up, if that’s what you’re implying, and could you stop checking your phone? It’s really distracting.

Muse:
How’s that “bull” story coming along?

Me:
Working on it.

Muse:
You’re a horrible liar.

Me:
I’ve got it right here.

Muse:
In your head.

Me:
No need to mock me. Sometimes characters develop over time.

Muse:
I’m just saying five years is a long time.

Me:
I’ve made a lot of progress on my granny witch story. I suppose I should thank you for that.

Muse:
Wow! Big of you. Yeah, I like that one. Keep at it.

Me:
Keep at it? That’s all you have for me? No concrete guidance? A little inspiration? Anything?

Muse:
Uh…nope. Got nothing, at the moment.

Me:
You know the light from your phone screen makes you look a little creepy.

Muse:
Way to go! A writer I work with in Florida just nailed the ending of her novel! Woohoo!

Me:
Hey! You scared my cats. Keep it down!

Muse:
Oh stop. They know me. Who do you think inspires them to use you as a launching pad in the middle of the night?

Me:
Figures.

Muse:
Look, 2015 was not such a bad year. You went to the Hub City Writers Workshop, got a story published, entered a few contests, and you have stories in progress, all while you worked a full-time job as a writer, and meeting those deadlines you’re always yapping about. All-in-all, not horrible. Could you have done more? Well, yeah. Just get more organized, disciplined…and stay off facebook! (GROANS). I’m feeling every one of my 2,100 years tonight.

Me:
Hey, wait! Where are you going? I’ve got stuff planned for 2016. I need you here. I don’t know where to start.

Muse:
Sit down and start typing. It’s as easy, and as difficult as that.

So how was your year of writing? Did you have many encounters with your Muse? Or did your Muse take a lengthy vacation? Either way, happy writing in the New Year!

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